🍝 THE DAILY SITDOWN 🍝

So, listen to this sh*t… Putin and this Modi fella, the Indian prime minister, they’re both in China, gettin’ the red carpet treatment, right? A whole bunch of other leaders too – some kind of security summit thingamajigger in Tianjin. Sounds like a goddamn convention for world leaders, the kind where they all sip champagne and pat each other on the back while the world burns. Capisce? It's the Shanghai Cooperation Organisation, or SCO, some kinda club China put together, you know? Like a little gang, only with countries instead of guys in tracksuits. China, Russia, a few other Central Asian patsys… they started it back in 2001 as a "countermeasure" to NATO, they call it. Like a goddamn anti-NATO league of nations, only, you know, less about democracy and more about… well, let’s just say less about democracy. This year, it's the biggest shindig they’ve ever thrown. This whole thing’s happening just before some massive military parade in Beijing. Eighty years since the end of World War II, they’re celebrating. They’re practically drooling to flex on the whole world, the same way I flex at the Bing when the girls come by, looking all cute in their dresses and high heels… Now, Modi, this guy’s been in China for the first time in seven years. Can you believe that sh*t? Seven years! Musta been some serious beef between them. Apparently, he had a chat with Xi Jinping, the big cheese in China, all smiles and handshakes. Said India wants to smooth things over, improve relations, blah, blah, blah… all that political mumbo jumbo. Put it on X, even. Like some kind of freakin’ Instagram post. “Mutual trust, dignity, sensitivity,” he says. Sounds like a bunch of hooey to me. It's all about what each of them can get from this whole thing. And the timing of this whole shebang? Fuckin’ perfect, actually, if you look at it from a certain angle. Trump, that orange clown, just slapped some hefty tariffs on Indian goods. Because India's still buying Russian oil, despite all the hoo-ha about the war in Ukraine. You see? This is how these guys dance. It's all a negotiation; the threats, the tariffs, the whole thing is a poker game. And they're all trying to make the best deal they can. So, now India and China – two giants who used to be at each other's throats over some border dispute in the Himalayas – they're suddenly all buddy-buddy. It’s like those two guys, Paulie and Chrissy, always fighting, then suddenly best friends over a plate of gabagool. See? Politics, business, it's all the same sh*t. This whole SCO thing? Mostly for show, I’d say. A chance to gripe about the Americans, trade a few favors under the table, and make deals. It's all about power. And the more you have it, the more people want it, so you’ve got to play your cards right. A little bit of sweet talk, a little bit of a threat, maybe a little bit of something… else. You gotta know how to handle your business and keep your enemies close, your friends closer… and your consigliere even closer. You get what I’m saying? This whole thing is a game, see? A big, complicated game with high stakes. And these guys, these world leaders… they’re all just playing their parts. Some are better at it than others.